On Attachment • 9 July 2025

#196: How & Why We Self-Abandon in Relationships

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If you deeply fear abandonment, there’s a good chance you’ve also been abandoning yourself in quiet, subtle, and painful ways.

In today’s episode, we’re exploring how fear of abandonment often leads to patterns of self-abandonment — especially for those with anxious attachment. We’ll look at why this happens, how it shows up in your relationships, and what it actually costs you when you disconnect from your truth just to stay connected to someone else.

You’ll learn:

  • Why self-abandonment is often a survival strategy rooted in early attachment wounds

  • What self-abandonment looks like in dating and relationships

  • The trade-off between authenticity and connection

  • Why the work must begin with us 

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