That Peter Crouch Podcast • 25 April 2025

Has The False Nine Debate Gone TOO FAR?

On this week’s episode of That Peter Crouch Podcast, Pete, Chris, and Sids dive in with some pre-marathon chat, as Sids gears up for the London Marathon with a torn calf and a point to prove. The lads rally behind him and address what turned out to be a not-so-accurate slogan—‘Quid for Sids’ (actually a fiver).

They unpack this week’s outrageous Premier League predictions, the form of teams like Liverpool and Arsenal, and what’s going on at Chelsea and Spurs. Plus, wild tangents ensue—from Jamie Vardy memes, to middle-seat van etiquette, to a riotous reinvention of football jargon with concepts like ‘false one’ and ‘fraudulent five’.

It’s classic chaos, with hot takes on Harry Maguire up front, Rimmel London’s football insight (kind of), and just enough stats to keep it somewhat legit.

Chumbawamba

00:00 – Introduction to the Friday Pod

01:08 – Sids reveals calf tear just weeks before the marathon

03:05 – Sids commits to running the marathon despite injury

05:14 – Crouch, Chris & Sids’ Premier League predictions

09:18 – Arsenal’s Champions League chances—real or hype?

11:14 – Faking Liverpool winning the title… sort of

13:12 – Championship drama and promotion praise

19:04 – Crouch on Harry Maguire: “Get him up front!”

24:10 – Ridiculous predictions for Liverpool v Spurs

31:12 – Neutral stand? Games gone.

48:10 – “Fraudulent One” and the rise of fake football positions